Where do we go from here?

Ever have a phrase touch off the memory of a song? It just happened to me. I was not thinking Alan Parsons Project when I typed the title for this post, but now I've got "Games People Play" running through my head.

And that's as good a place as any to begin my inaugural post. Very indicative, probably. But the title is also appropriate to my life outside to blog as well.

You see, I've just undergone a couple of life changing experiences in the last few weeks or so. I went from being a temporary contractor to a permanent employee to co-manager of a brand new department in only a few weeks. I'm thrilled beyond measure, and I'm scared at the same time. I've often thought over the last few years that I could handle being a manager. I knew what I'd do in many of the situations I saw around me. But I was an armchair quarterback then. It didn't matter if I was right or wrong.

Now I get to find out if I can hack it. I think I can...I think I can...I think I can. I've only been working with this comany for about six months, and I don't even have the organizational structure figured out yet, let alone all the various processes my group will be running up against. It's going to be sink or swim for awhile.

Of course I still have to finish out the assignment I was working on before this promotion came about. It's a big assignment--and it's incredibly dull work. It's the sort of assignment I changed departments in my last job in order to avoid doing again. And it's standing between me and my dream job.

But as big a change as this promotion entails, it pales in comparison to the birth of our third child. Childbirth is an amazing process, and my respect for my wife increases every time. My respect for our other two children has increased, too. When they grow up day by day right in front of you it's so easy to forget that they were once little floppy, pink, helpless, mewling bundles too. To quote the Virginia Slims ad, you've come a long way, baby!

We're in survival mode right now. Our sleep schedule has been blown to smithereens, and though we've had some encouraging nights lately, we're by no means out of the woods yet. Pretty much all our energy goes into making it through one day and into the next right now. That's okay. We've been through it twice before, and we survived each time.

I'm in the middle of a period of incredible transition, and I'm loving almost every minute. Yes, there are moments when I lose it. It comes with the territory. But I can't help but notice how incredibly wonderful my life is. Everything seems so unreal right now, like I'm in a dream. Of course that could be the sleep-deprivation talking.

Part of me says the other shoe has to drop some time. And another part of me says "Who cares! Just enjoy it right now, because for better or worse, this time will never come again." I think I'm going to listen to the latter voice, because if the last month has taught me anything at all, it's that your life can take dramatic turns in a stunningly short amount of time.

Tomorrow may be even bettern. Tomorrow may begin the most excruciating trial I'll ever face. But today...

Today is pure gold.